SOFTLY SPOKEN: “FULL CIRCLE”

By Kris Holladay

Eleven years ago, I was on a flight from Phoenix to Salt Lake City. About the time we would be flying over the Grand Canyon, the pilot speaking from the cockpit, alerted us to the spectacular view out the left side of the aircraft. I looked up from my book expecting to see the Grand Canyon from 30,000 feet, which is truly an amazing sight! Instead, I saw something I had never seen before! Just below the aircraft and above the canyon’s Colorado River, there was a circular rainbow! Not just an arch from horizon to horizon, but a complete circle with all the colors vibrant and stunning! I sat mesmerized and would not allow myself to blink for fear it would be gone if I closed my eyes if even for a moment. I stared for what felt like hours, but only a few seconds had passed. I studied each band of color and with awe, realized that a rainbow in its truest form is actually a full circle!

I was flying to Utah for a special occasion. Our oldest daughter was expecting her first child and she invited me to go with her and her husband to their first ultrasound. I remember how incredible it was to witness those first pictures of our soon to be born granddaughter! When the doctor came into the room, he cordially introduced himself. As required, he asked Tricia all the preliminary questions about her health and habits. Then he asked the innocent and yet emotionally charged question, “Do you have any family member that has a genetic disorder?” The room was quiet as she answered, “Yes, my younger sister was born with trisomy 18. Oh, and she lived to be almost 11.” Not wanting him to misunderstand, I added, “Almost 11 YEARS!” He kindly looked at me and asked if I was Tricia’s mother. I smiled and responded that I was indeed the proud mother of six children and soon to be grandmother of one.

In talking to the doctor about trisomy 18, I stated there was an organization for families with….. and just as I started to finish my sentence, he interrupted and said, “Oh, you mean SOFT?” With some shock, we all nodded yes, surprised that he knew what I was about to say. I asked him what he knew about the SOFT organization. He then told us that some years ago while working in the Midwest, a nurse from the genetics clinic would bring him every issue of the newsletter. He said he read them with great interest and was touched by the stories and the lives he came to know through the newsletter.

The next sentence he spoke will stay with me forever. He said, “The SOFT newsletter changed my life! It changed the way I talk to families because of the stories I read.” I asked him what he had learned. His response was profound. He said, “I realize that every family need hope and every family need one piece of good news. No matter what I find on an ultrasound, I will always give some hope and some good news. Families need at least that much from us.”

He then asked how I came to know about SOFT. Tricia giggled and said, “Go ahead, Mom, tell him.” I briefly told him about Kari and Dr. Carey and our ties to Salt Lake City and the University of Utah and how our lives had changed for the better in the many years since her birth. I was proud to share with him that Kari’s legacy of love and hope was the Support Organization for Trisomy 18, 13, and Related Disorders.

Like a circular rainbow, this moment was a rare sight. In this brief appointment, I saw the future in a grandchild’s ultrasound image; I heard the past in Kari’s message of hope; I felt the immediate love between my daughter and her husband; so the past, present, and future were brought together in a sweet moment in time. As we left the ultrasound room, I embraced my beautiful daughter knowing my life had truly come full circle!

Hugs…Kris

April 2013